Five Day Update

All right - let me catch you guys up from Thursday on. Bad news first.

On Thursday night (while I was at work) Toni got a knock on the door after midnight, which spooked her. Turns out it was the repo man, who returned the next day at a more reasonable hour. Damn. I think we can get her ride back with non problem, though - it just means a few more bills will be late.

The buyer on my house is being skittery and tried to back out, but I just found out that they're still in. If the deal falls through I might go back and take back my ceiling fans, my vise and my coffin, but Toni says we can get new fans. I'm now supposed to close on the 13th - I'll keep you folks posted.

I also have to be out of our office by the end of the week, as I've fallen too far behind to stay. We have an agreement worked out with the landlady so we can get back in eventually.

Wednesday night I accidentally broke a bottle of Worcestershire sauce (which I think it gross) in the kitchen, which resulted in a strongly smell permeating the room. Pumba tried to cover it up but his efforts were without success.

While we had Code Name Diamond on Thursday night, we played another round of "Will Pumba Eat It?" This week it was Little Caesar's Breadsticks - the answer is "no".

On both Friday and Saturday nights I ended up cleaning up the bar almost by myself. The other bouncers either called in sick or left before we were even close to being done. I'd gripe more but I came in late both nights (for good reason, I might add) and I got to make up the time afterwards. I was there until 3:45 AM on both nights, but I liked to be able to get the job done my way and leave knowing the jobs were all done correctly. Let's talk about why I was late though, shall we?

On Friday I was late because I took Code Name Diamond to our church's Daddy / Daughter Dance at Circle R Ranch. We ate BBQ (which was tasty), got our picture taken, took a hayride and danced. She petted the horses and we played pool, and shuffleboard. It was a lot of fun, and I was really happy to get to spend some quality time with her and create some good memories with her. I'm glad we go to spend some "us" time.

On Friday night, after the bar closed, I was notified by Lou (the hot dog guy) that there was a guy passed out in the parking lot, sitting in his car, with the lights on, the motor running, parked in a handicapped space.

Nice.

After several unsuccessful attempts to wake him, I took his keys, killed his lights, told him to sleep tight, and locked him in his car. I took his keys and put them on his right rear tire, figuring when he woke up, he'd have to be fairly sober to find his keys. His car was gone the next day, so I guess he found 'em. Next time that happens I'm going to hide the keys and leave a note saying "if you want your keys back, call (my phone number)" and if they sound sober enough I'll tell 'em where I hid 'em.

Saturday, after a breakfast of marshmallow waffles and bacon (which Toni cooked to perfection) the three of us went on a nature walk the woods. Our daughter got to do some exploring, which she enjoyed. She played in a little waterfall and learned a little about animal tracking. Saturday night we had dinner at Brian & Cristina's place, where she played with Diesel, Tim's pug, whom she eventually wore out. Bri made smoked chicken, which was almost good enough to make me cry. It was totally worth being late for work for, and I didn't get in trouble anyway. I like hanging out with Bri & his wife - they're really nice and marvelous hosts.

On Saturday night, I worked the door at the bar. As it turns out, it was fortunate I did, because at about midnight, this drunk guy and his buddy show up the door with a bartender from the tavern next door hot on his heels. As soon as the drunk pulls out his ID, the bartender tells me "Hey - we just kicked this guy out because he peed in a trash can." And thus began the discussion:

Me: Sorry, pal - you can't come in.
Drunk: Why not?
Me: Because you peed in a trash can at Woody's.
Drunk: So?
Me: If you get kicked out of Woody's you can't come in here.
Drunk: I didn't pee in a trash can.
Me: Woody's says you did. You can't come in.
Drunk: Who said I peed in a trash can?
Me: The bartender right behind you. He said you did.
Drunk: I don't know that guy.
Me: I'll bet you don't. Take a hike, pal. Have a good night.
Drunk: But why can't I come in?
Me: Because you peed in a trash can at Woody's.
Drunk: I didn't pee in a trash can.
Me: You aren't coming in tonight, man. Take a hike.
Drunk: Why?
Me: We're a private club, man. We are refusing you service.
Drunk: But why?
Me: We reserve the right to refuse service to anybody. Get lost.
Drunk: But why?
Me: Look man, you can leave on your own our I can compel you to leave.
Drunk: But why? I didn't pee in a trash can.
Me: This is not a discussion, sport. Nothing you can say is going to change the fact that you're not coming in tonight.

-> At this point his friend turns to leave.

Drunk: Why won't you let me in?
Me: Because you peed in a trash can at Woody's. Walk away. Now.
Drunk: I didn't pee.
Me: Get out, man. I'm not going to tell you again.
Drunk: I don't know that guy. Who's that guy?

-> Friend steps entirely away & out the door. I flash the cop inside the club because I want a witness I told this clown to leave before I eject him.

Cop: What's up?
Me: He got kicked out of Woody's. He's got alcohol on his breath & won't leave. Oh - he also peed in a trash can.
Drunk: Who's that guy?
Cop: Did you pee in a trash can?
Drunk: Huh? No. I don't know that guy. I didn't pee in a trash can.
Cop: Did he tell you to leave?
Drunk: Who's that guy?
Cop: Take a hike, man. Come back another night.
Drunk: Why?

-> I blade my shoulders & put my flashlight in it's holder, cop reaches for baton.

Drunk: (struggling to put ID back in his wallet) Fine.

Dang.

On Sunday we went to church and made burgers afterwards. Code Name Diamond played computer games for much of the afternoon as it looked like rain. I napped on the couch, and her Mom picked her up at 5. Toni was a trooper all weekend and took care of both of us - no easy task.

Today we've been doing work stuff all day, but it's stuff than NEEDS to get done, and fast. It'll be the same deal tomorrow and Wednesday, which is good news.

Oh - I do have court tomorrow for two citations I got in Roanoke, both of which I had coming but can't afford to do anything about today. I'll have throw myself on the mercy of the court and see if I can work some of it off or REALLY stretch out the payment plans.

Anyway, that's all of it for now. See you guys tomorrow - thanks for reading!

357

Ooooooooo - cool number.